Today is chill day. It was not planned, but expected. Once a month, my body wants to rest. This time I am lucky that this time falls on the weekend and not on a day during the week. You can probably guess what I'm talking about. I am talking about female menstruation. And poof, maybe at this point the first ones are already gone, especially the men, who can now feel a little uncomfortable. But wait, not so fast! You could change your view of your world and us women significantly in the next few minutes :-).Give this topic a chance because it is so fundamental to understanding how we function and what we need. It is almost a taboo subject in our society, but it is part of our human nature. And there is nothing wrong with that, on the contrary!
When I was a child, getting my period was a big drama. As a young girl, you were almost pitied and then, of course, ashamed. Even among ourselves, we hardly ever talked about it. All of a sudden I couldn't go to the swimming pool anymore, I had to come up with funny excuses so that no one would notice, some people invented funny expressions like "riding the red wave", and tampons were exchanged secretly among the women almost like at a drug handover - so that no man would notice. And that's actually still the case, even in adulthood. Do you know that? Today I find it almost embarrassing and also a pity that we resist so much to accept our female nature and to deal with it openly. Yesterday I also "dared" to turn down a friend with the reason that I had got my period and therefore didn't feel so good. Maybe he didn't want to hear it and felt a bit uncomfortable, I don't know, but I just don't want to beat around the bush any more, I want to be open and honest about it and I wish others would do the same. That's just the way it is!
Today I am in winter. I woke up in peace this morning and didn't set an alarm clock. I had breakfast in peace, all without stress, and then I went straight back to the couch. To make it extra nice, I put on floral socks and wrapped myself in cuddly blankets. If it hadn't been so hot anyway, I would have made myself another hot water bottle or some tea. I just realise that my body needs rest and a break, no company and just wants to sleep. And since it's Saturday today, I can treat myself to that wonderfully without coming into conflict with appointments or work. Every now and then, thoughts and feelings of stress have popped up about all the things I don't have to do, things that have been lying around for a while, and that there is this and that tonight. But I decided to give my body the rest it needs and see what happens when I fully engage with it. I don't want to force myself to do anything today, and thus override myself just to function or live up to others' expectations.
The exciting thing about menstruation is that there are four phases, based on the phases of the moon. Do you know them? They are called the winter, spring, summer and autumn. Here's a quick rundown:
Winter: Menstruation (3-7 days)
Spring: follicular phase (7-10 days)
Summer: ovulation (3-4 days)
Autumn: Corpus luteum phase (10-14 days)
All phases are accompanied by different emotions, different needs and different energy levels. In winter (menstruation), for example, we are more withdrawn, do not want company and quiet and are good at letting go of issues and reflecting on what is important in our lives. For example, we can write a journal, go for light walks or treat ourselves to a hot bath. That's how this blog article came about. Everything that has to do with feeling and enjoyment. This is how we can prepare ourselves for spring. In spring (follicular phase), the energy slowly comes back. It represents the phase of growth, creativity and expression. Here we begin to blossom again and participate in life. The focus slowly turns outwards again until it reaches its peak in summer (ovulation). Here we have a great drive and radiance. I always notice it in my attractiveness and persuasiveness at this time. I feel strong, invulnerable and fully in my centre. This is a wonderful time for job interviews, flirting with men, having fun and also good sex. I often have the feeling in this phase that I can do everything with ease and am surrounded only by fullness. In autumn (yellow body phase) we start to look more inwards again. We draw our energies from the outside more into the inside again and focus on ourselves. We become calmer, emotions come up and we can let things go. I notice it in the fact that I don't necessarily want to be around people any more and the doing becomes less. And then after autumn it starts all over again.
You see what a wonderful cycle life has set up. And we ignore it and ungratefully dismiss it as a nuisance because we come into winter for a few days? I believe that very few people really know these phases and their own rhythm. That's how I felt some time ago. I am of the opinion that we should deal with it and that if we accept it lovingly, we can come into our full power. If we feel inside ourselves how we feel in the respective phases, then we can come into such close contact with ourselves that we can use the phases wonderfully for ourselves and the achievement of our goals. This is why I celebrate winter so much today. I take the time to reflect on myself, let go of issues that don't feel right and realign myself. Then I can realise the things that are important to me with new energy and focus. I use my energies consciously and will certainly experience the next month more relaxed, more successful and also happier.
And why is this also important for you men? For one thing, because you love us women, like to have us around you and want us to be well, don't you? If you know what makes us tick, you can certainly accept us better sometimes and also support us in living according to our nature. There is nothing better for me than when a man supports you to be who you are and to come into my full feminine power. Male energy is just wonderful and is the matching counterpart to ours. Whether it's allowing ourselves to rest when we need it, forgiving ourselves for impulsive reactions when we're in autumn (sorry, I was in autumn last week! ;-)), or understanding in our working lives that we just can't power through every day for a month like you do. In the same way, we women are also allowed to have understanding and love for ourselves and accept that everything is just so right!
I am now absolutely in love with the female cycle, its individual phases and its regularity. We can rely on it and thus plan according to it. I even often plan important dates and activities according to it. That means I know exactly that I shouldn't make any demanding work appointments in winter, or even make a workshop appointment, because I wouldn't be in my strength to negotiate tough. In summer, on the other hand, it's all easy-going :-). It's also a great time to go on holiday with friends, arrange dates or try out a new challenging activity. I really recommend living by it as much as possible and experiencing how much lighter and more energetic life will feel!
I hope I could give you some new impulses and a new view on our natural rhythm. There is no reason to hide or even demonise menstruation. Instead, let's celebrate it and gain even more awareness for ourselves through it!
How do you feel about menstruation? Are you aware of your phases and the emotions associated with them? Do you always go beyond your needs? Where would you like to be more understanding? What would you like to change in your life in order to get into better contact with yourself? To you men: Are you aware of the cyclical nature of women? How can you support her concretely or accept it better?
Two more book tips for you:
Die Zyklus Strategie - von Sabeth Ohl und Eva Dignös
Woman be wild - von Indigo